Pet Cobra

So Long, and Thanks For All The Fish

2005-03-21T14:49:00.000-08:00

Well, Blogger, it's been real. I'm firing up Pet Cobra 2.0, thanks to TypePad, which I'm loving already. Here's the NEW ADDRESS:

http://ruggerjay.typepad.com/pet_cobra/

Please go there. And if you have me linked on your sites, you'll get all the hetero man-love I can muster by changing the olde addresse to the new one above.

Are you still here? Go!

Pet Cobra 2.0

2005-03-21T07:48:00.000-08:00

To quote an estimable Sailor Man: "I've had all I can stands - I can't stands no more!" On a whim I changed the template in a desparate attempt to get back my links, archives, and profile. As you can see, no luck. Blogger. I curse you. I cuuuuuuuuuuuuurse you.

I'm figuring out my course of action for Pet Cobra 2.0. I'm leaning heavily towards TypePad; since I'm HTML illiterate, I don't think I can whip up a "from-scratch" version of this blog, as much as I'd dearly like to. So whatever happens, I'll let you all know my new address when it's up and running. There's lots I'd like to do - new layout, graphics, categories, all that good stuff. I'd appreciate suggestions on the best way to make this happen!

Meanwhile, had a relaxing weekend, spending most of yesterday at the beach. The surf was unspeakable, mixed up and blown out, so no regrets there. There's apparently a Sunday game of touch rugby on the Del Mar shores; we're out of town next weekend but I'm planning on checking it out the weekend following.

This morning I get to roll up the sleeves and go man-a-mano with the boss over my pay situation. Wish me luck.

2005-03-20T21:52:00.000-08:00

Hang 20

My Relationship Is On The Rocks

2005-03-19T08:01:00.000-08:00

Blogger, we need to talk.

First, and I know this is shallow - you're, well, ordinary. I admit it - I find myself gazing longingly at other people's blogs. Wondering what it must be like to have a catchy logo, or to know the thrill of posting pictures without using Hello. Top ten lists. What I'm Reading. Yes, Blogger, you have a great personality, but physically, you just don't do it for me anymore.

And I feel like I don't even know who you are. Blogger Buzz? You've changed, and not in a good way.

But most of all, you're not there for me when I need you. It's been two days since I called you for help. And how do you respond? You direct me to Blogger Buzz.

It's not you, Blogger. It's me. I'm just not into you anymore. I think I need to see another host.

Happy Fucking Friday

2005-03-18T13:00:00.000-08:00

Ugh. Like the new look of Pet Cobra? I guess I'm not alone in my Blogger woes. Oh well. You get what you pay for. Hopefully things will be fixed by Monday. On tap for the weekend - rain. Should be starting any minute. Which means I'll be stuck in the house, obsessing over my current work predicament. Have a good weekend, all, and send good thoughts my way.

Oh, and I watched Napoleon Dynamite last night. I don't get it.

Bend Over, Drop Your Pants, and Spread 'Em

2005-03-17T14:25:00.000-08:00

So I got my Official Offer Letter today, the one that I was so excited to receive (based on the title of this entry, and the preceding sentence, those of you who've taken Literature 101 should be able to recognize Ironic Foreshadowing).

Long story short - I did the math. The salary numbers on the offer letter added up to several thousand dollars LESS THAN WHAT I AM CURRENTLY MAKING AS A CONTRACTOR.

Tuesday my boss told me that I would not be making MORE than what I was drawing in take-home. Well, technically, it seems she was correct.

Now, my boss had to up and leave for Virginia this morning to deal with a crisis at one of our offices there. She will not be back until Monday, my deadline for signing and accepting that offer. So I emailed her the following: " In our conversation you stated that my salary would not increase, and I had no expectation that it would. However, my current salary is $_/hour, translating to $______annualized based on 2080 hours worked. As stated in the letter, my annual salary would decrease to $_______. To be honest, I was surprised at this, as in my experience I've never seen a reduction in take-home pay with candidates converting into a full-time regular position. Is this something that we can discuss when you have a moment?"

Now, I'm currently making $3,000 or so less than my predecesor, who was himself a fulltime employee with full benefits. What I was offered is close to $10,000 less than what he was making. That is UN-FUCKING-ACCEPTABLE.

I'm actually at a loss for words right now. Well, other than goddamnmotherfuckingassholepieceofshit.

Top 'O The Mornin' To Ya

2005-03-17T09:05:00.000-08:00

Sure 'an begorah, I'm tired as fuck. (My Colin Farrell impersonation.) )

Lucas woke up shrieking at midnight, and cried nonstop until 1:00. We couldn't figure out what was wrong. Tried everything - diaper change, water, rocking, singing, reciting his favorite bedtime story. Of the numerous Horrible Feelings that come with being a parent, that ranks up at the top - your child is very, very upset, and there's not a damn thing you can do about it.

But there's a flip side, as always - he woke up this morning laughing and happy. Must be the smidgen of Irish blood (courtesy of me nana)in him.

Highs and Lows

2005-03-16T20:46:00.000-08:00

The good part: getting to spend the day with Lucas. We had breakfast and watched rugby, then went to Sea World for the afternoon. It was a lovely spring day, sunny and warm, and we had a blast. No pictures, as I'll keep the day in my mind forever. This is a sad fact: I won't get too many days like this, just me and him, and today was one to be cherished.

The bad part: a while back, Lucas figured out how to open up the disc tray on the Xbox. He did so this evening, and decided to lean on the open tray with all of his weight, and in doing so busted it. I can buy a new one for what it'll cost to fix. So a milestone - the first expensive item to fall victim to our inquisitive kid. (Silver lining - not buying EA Sports Rugby 2005 WAS the wise move...)

My Thing With Money

2005-03-15T12:54:00.000-08:00

I got the greenlight to buy EA Sports Rugby 2005. This is HUGE. I get to BUY AN XBOX GAME WITH MY WIFE'S BLESSING. It's a reward for the good news yesterday.

So I'm at Best Buy today, and I have the game in hand, and I'm about to buy it...and then I pause. It's $40. Not a lot of money. Then the overthinking starts. The game will be on sale within weeks because rugby is a fringe sport and there probably isn't a big market for it. Then I start thinking of what else that $40 can go towards; I need new everything (shoes, shirts, shorts, underwear socks, contacts...). Then I start feeling guilty - we don't a home...we need a new car...we have a child to support. So I put the game back and head out. Whew! That was a close one! No Debtor's Prison for me! Lucas will be able to go to college! We won't have to sell Mick to the Vivisection Lab!

The Yang to The Foul Chicken/ No Depth Perception Yin

2005-03-14T15:08:00.000-08:00

Effective next Monday, I'm no longer a Contract Recruiter. I'll be a Full Time Regular Employee. Thus - paid time off, and a nice increase in our monthly income because we no longer have to pay for ex-fucking-spensive insurance.

YERP!!!!!!!! (New joyful interjection, copyright 2005 by Jason S. Avant.)

My Fear Factor Lunch

2005-03-14T12:41:00.000-08:00

Petit Bistro, University Towne Center. Ordered the "Bistro Chicken Caesar Salad". This is a caesar salad with a mound of teriyaki chicken on top. Correction. It's a room-temperature caesar salad with a mound of fatty lukewarm pieces of cut-up chicken thigh, drowned in teriyaki sauce. Addendum: Poorly cut-up pieces of chicken thigh, the indicator being the wet CRRRRRUNCH resulting from biting into several pieces of chicken thigh that still had bits of joint cartilege attached.

It is Monday, and I Am Wearing Glasses

2005-03-14T11:00:00.000-08:00

My left contact is encrusted with fossilized eyesnot. Thus I am wearing my glasses today. Plus side: I can now see out of my left eye. Minus side: I have no depth perception. My apologies to the mountain biker I ran over on the drive to work. Put some Bactine on that leg; it'll be fine.

Dry Land Practice

2005-03-13T18:46:00.000-08:00

We went to the Shores today for a picnic with our friends Barb and Brian. No surf to speak of, but clearly the surfing gene runs strong in my family.

2005-03-13T18:45:00.000-08:00

Nature or nurture?

The Surf Report for Saturday, March 12

2005-03-12T09:40:00.000-08:00

No bad days. Even though conditions were poor - low tide, 2-3 foot closeouts, and the usual crowd at the Shores - it was great to finally paddle out. Spent most of my time sitting on the board, waiting for sets that never came. Waves caught: two (no picturesque descriptions of my rides - there's not a lot of verbage that be squeezed from the 30 or so seconds I actually spent surfing). Moment of the morning: witnessing a near collision between a 10 foot longboard and a stupid lady who thought that swimming - no, BACKSTROKING - amongst 60 odd surfers would be a good idea. Water Safety Tip for you beach novices - getting hit in the head with a large fiberglass torpedo is never fun.

2005-03-12T09:38:00.000-08:00

La Jolla Shores - good from far...

2005-03-12T09:37:00.000-08:00

...far from good.

2005-03-11T12:57:00.000-08:00

Major heart attack on the drive home yesterday that I failed to mention. The Blackberry told me I had an email; I was at a red light so I took a glance. Email was from my boss. Subject line: Blogging. JesusharoldchristIamsototallyfired, I thought.

Nope. My boss had read an article about recruiters setting up recruiting blogs on their company websites; I had read the same article and discussing that with her was on my "to do" list. Her email was about that article, and if I thought that would be a good idea for my company. Sent her a reply today that yes, it's a branding concept that a number of companies are putting into play and that I'd be interested in doing it. (Listen to me. Branding concept. That's rich.)

I'm actually excited about the weekend. No rain. No plans. Only one thing on my mind.

Surfing.

I am waking my ass up and doing the Dawn Patrol. Visions of peeling lefts and morning glass and the dorsal fins of distant dolphins dance in my head.

Dog.

Will.

Hunt.

I Am Confident Enough In My Manhood To Freely Admit The Following...

2005-03-11T08:23:00.000-08:00

Last night, I watched the "Star Wars: Episode III" trailer. Then I rewound it and watched it again. Then I watched it one more time. Then I told my dog that the movie looks like it's going to kick ass.

Connections

2005-03-10T14:18:00.000-08:00

FINALLY! Been trying to post and comment all day. Oh well. You get what you pay for. I'm a bit surprised at how bummed I was that Blogger was on the fritz. I mean - what the hell am I supposed to DO all day? Work?

An unexpected bonus of blogging: getting to learn about and chat with people from all points on the map. I get to experience Chris', aka Rude Cactus, sheer joy at seeing Lima Bean's image on a sonogram and the rush ofemotion that comes when you realize that the picture is your little daughter. (Go read his post from yesterday, and bring a Kleenex; I'm a crass punk, and even I got a little veklempt). I get to live vicariously through Whiffleboy, Surfsister and Beachgirl; people who I'd love to meet in the lineup some day (not to worry, guys: I won't become another buoy at Sunset, but if you're ever up for a surf trip to San Diego let me know). I find out that Hib-Gib and I have had similar adventures in the High Desert and share an abiding love for the glory that is Lynda Carter. I get to keep it real with Stacy and Libby, who remind me of all the things I love about Beth, and who therefore are married to very lucky guys indeed.

It's a cool place, this virtual neighborhood, inhabited by people who are a pleasure to know.

LUCAS MELTDOWN UPDATE: Tooth Number Six poked through. Mystery solved. Absolute Pleasure In Life #6: Lucas waking up laughing in the morning.

Goddammit, I am now an Amazing Race Fan

2005-03-09T13:16:00.000-08:00

The LAST thing I need in my life is a new TV show. I was happy. Fulfilled, even. I had my TV Oasis - Lost, Alias, Smallville, The West Wing - and now Deadwood is back. I DON'T EVEN LIKE REALITY SHOWS. Survivor: Palau sucks ass. Literally. I watch it, and ten minutes into an ep all I want to do is drop trou and press my ass against the screen. I think even Jeff Probst agress with me at this point. I keep waiting for him to gather everyone in both tribes together at Council and say "Immunity - NOT up for grabs. For any of you. You all can suck my ass." Then he pours gasoline on all of them and hits them all with a lit torch.

Deep breath. Anyhoo. The Amazing Race. I like it. Maybe it's because they go to some cool places that I'd love to see but sadly never will. Maybe it's because it's always fun to watch Americans reinforcing foreign opinion that we're all a bunch of uncultured jackasses. Maybe it's because Survivor All-Stars Boston Rob and AMBUH (She With The Smokin' Ass) were stunt-cast and thus far are the dominant force in the Race. Anyway, the show rocks. People, what are your thoughts? Are you watching? Are you all about B-Rob and AMBUH? Are you now fired up to go visit Peru and chew on coca leaves? Give me your thoughts.

2005-03-09T12:33:00.000-08:00

The Coronado Bay Bridge. Pretty cool. I stole the pic.

Meltdown

2005-03-09T09:52:00.000-08:00

This is what happened: last night, Beth had a doctor's appointment at 6:00. So it was me and Lucas. Nothing to do except feed him and wait for Beth to get home. Piece of cake.

It started with his new trick. His shriek. He's in his high chair, sitting behind a pile of his mixed veggies (he loves them, especially the lima beans. We count our blessings.), and the shriek begins. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I give him a sippy cup with milk. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I give him a sippy cup with water. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. I pick out a couple of lima beans and offer those up. EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Then the Hysterical Crying starts in earnest. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. I pick him up. I being my Mantra: "Shhh. It's OK. Shhhh. It's OK. Shhh. It's OK". Mick is pacing around nervously which does not help; I order him out outside and he gratefully complies. I take Lucas back to his room to check his diaper. Clear. Hysterical Crying continues. I check my watch. 6:10. Flailing Madly is now accompanying Hysterical Crying. Mantra continues. Sweat beads on my forehead. I put him back in the high chair. He kicks the Hysterical Crying up a notch. I am now heating up his dinner (Turkey Stew, which he loves). It's the Longest Thirty Seconds Of My Life. Finally, the Turkey Stew is done. I dash over to the high chair and start feeding him.

This does the trick. Calm returns.

Lucas has had a bit of a cold, and is out of sorts. Poor little guy. You feel so bad for them when they are that upset, and they can't tell you why. Good thing there's Turkey Stew and a post-dinner game of Bounce The Ball to make the world right again.

Why We Need New Surfboards, and What We Will Do To Get Them

2005-03-08T10:25:00.000-08:00

It's always a bad, bad thing when I find a new local shaper who doesn't charge $1000 or more for a custom longboard. It gets the wheels turning, as it did yesterday when I took a look at Ody's website (linked on The Surf and The Fury). Ody makes boards out of his shop in Cardiff, just up the road from where we live.

Now, the non-surfers, even those close to us (friends, relatives, spouses, significant others), always ask the same question. "You already HAVE a surfboard. Why do you want another one?"

It's actually not a matter of "want"; it's a matter of "need". Our sport's playing field is an inconsistant one. Wave size and power, of course, varies from day to day, and from season to season. My board, for example, is perfect for chest-high to overhead surf; a performance longboard, it's got a narrow tail, a bit more rocker (curvier, for the layperson), and side fins for added speed and manueverability. It's great for the bigger, heavier days of winter. When summer rolls around, though, and the waves get smaller, my board is more often a source of frustration. In short, I need a longer, flatter ride. Ideally, a 9'6" singlefin.

So I tested the waters yesterday. I mae an IM comment to Beth about the cheap shaper. Her response - if she has a "great" b-day, a new board may be on the bargaining table. So I asked the question that surfing husbands around the world ask in the hopes of achieving surfboard reciprocity.

"How many carats?"

2005-03-07T14:56:00.000-08:00

I need a haircut. Lucas has cake on his lips. Still, we are a couple of pimps.